It's these little times that will help to remind

Cold.

2006-11-03T07:37:56Z

The weather has been flakey lately. Cold, hot, fresh, warm, average, etc. It frustates me sometimes.

I'm on the search for a new job, but I've been a lazy bastard and not getting to complete my resume. I have my car now, by the way, in case you didn't know. Life has been 1000x easier since I got it and I redeemed about 80% of my liberty back. It's refreshing to come and go as I please within the boundaries of a decent time schedule.

As for my friends, I've struggled with some, but in essence, I'm quite content. Amanda has become one of my dearest friends, we can relate in so many aspects, it's quite frightening sometimes. In regards to an older entry (too lazy to search it) I wrote in the summer, I can finally say I'm back. I needed a lot of time to juice out the sulkiness I had in me for quite a while, and although it's a slow process, the results are more than apparent. They seem to rub off on others. I never knew I could influence so many people, the gratification is endless. I do the things I do for the greater good and I'm pretty basic, not complicated like most people are.

I registered for my classes yesterday and I might be taking an extra class each semester to approximate graduation as soon as possible. I can't believe it's finally happening, this year went by like the speed of light on crack. It's 1:35 a.m. and I have to work at 9 a.m. I have big plans for the weekend per usual, but that's another story. Perhaps, if time may allow it, I shall enthrall you with the ocurrances for the next couple of days. We'll see. Until then, be safe and flush your toilets, please. No, seriously, please do.

Carlos

Briefly.

2006-10-12T11:23:56Z

Things have been going smoothly. Quite smoothly, it's a bit scary since I'm used to feeling pressured 24/7. In any case, I fell asleep at 8 p.m. and woke up at 3:45 a.m. and haven't been able to sleep since. I think I'm just used to 7-8 hours of sleep. I have to do homework though, which I'll get to shortly.

I've been thinking about some people who say the stupidest things and I cringe. It makes me feel dirty to even think about what they say. How can someone be so... I won't even.

Work and the university has been gratifying, it's very interesting to see how things evolve in one place while others disintegrate. That's life, easy comes, easy goes.

This journal brings back a lot of memories... So many years, so many people and all my experiences. So much confusion, misunderstanding, happiness, and sadness. The growth of a guy in 4-5 years. I don't quite know why I decided to keep this journal, since I do have another one and blog in it frequently, though it is private.

I wonder what will happen one year from now. Where will I be one year from now? I feel like eating rice. Damn smell of food.

When I try to help out...

2006-10-06T04:22:20Z

It always backfires. I tend to give worthy advice to most, if not all my friends. The majority take it.

Others... just don't, and keep complaining.

There was a situation a while ago with somebody I used to date recently. We broke up in good terms and I gave the advice of not compromising their own happiness for anybody else's. Give themselves time, space and the liberty to act upon their greatest desires and what they've been yearning for. What happens? They go back with their ex... back into the same hole they "try" to get out from. One of my best friends asked me how I felt. I told her I felt great, I wasn't the dumbass who got back with the ex who treated everyone like shit. Plus, it was more infatuation I had than anything else. No love involved.

Since I'm on that note, sometimes I think I'm incapable of loving anybody. Well, in a romantic way. Not that it worries me, I'm just not interested in relationships or meeting people. Many times I think I'm too good for a lot of people. Others might take it the wrong way, like previous 'friendships,' but I see it as a virtue. I save myself the trouble of seeing assholes every weekend, so it works out pretty well for me... but I digress.

Whenever someone asks for help, give them your best suggestions. If they don't ask for it, don't even bother. For your sake, just tell them in the future not to whine about their petty bullshit, because it is highly unwarranted and terribly boring. Believe me.

This is one of the reasons I don't talk to people out of my circle of trust. The less, the better.

Question.

2006-10-02T16:26:41Z

Why do people resort to wanting their dirty business to be known all over the world? What happened to handling things in a civil manner, like letting things go? I mean, I can understand it if we were 12 or something. At this point, it seems rather pathetic.

Let's say I have a problem. I'm trying to solve it by figuring out what is wrong and asking why. Isn't it logical and polite to respond? Not trying to be mean here, but isn't that the way it should be done? I think so, at least that's the way I see it.

And what is it with people slandering others when they weren't liked back? Let's say I have a crush on Michael Jackson, but Michael kindly tells me that I'm not his type, and Michael is obviously a busy person and he doesn't call me all the time like I want him to. Does that give me the right to get on the psycho train and start talking smack whenever his name comes up?

People complicate themselves too much, and what's worse is that they think I give a fuck. I don't. The reason I wrote this damn entry was because it was constantly brought up to my attention this past week and it also makes me wonder, if I don't worry about it, then why do others?

!!!

At any rate, I'm not mad, I just hate being annoyed with stupid shit like this, especially when they bring it to my friends and they worry. They know now, though. I do feel a bit lame typing about this, there's more important things to write about. I've got 99 problems and a bitch ain't one of them.

Something to remember.

2006-09-30T21:01:10Z

When I was seven years old, I kept a little notebook in my room, and in there, I had sketches of Eva Peron, wife of Argentina's ex dictator, Carlos Peron. I also drew portraits of Geri Halliwell, Emma Bunton and Mafalda every afternoon I would get home. I've been curious to find that notebook, but I fear all my old belongings in our old house are gone. I left so many memories behind, so many books... and many artifacts that brought happiness to my childhood.

I also had an old copy of "Don Quixote," which I read in Spanish, back when I was 13. Now, I have no idea of what it was about. Sometimes, growing up makes you forget about things which deemed a pivotal point back in that time. Whenever I feel a bit out of place, I go back 10 years and find comfort within those distant, yet close memories. It's never too late to get back on track on what was planned as a child. Unfortunately, too many obstacles appeared as the years went by and what is even more sad, is how people are the biggest obstacle of them all. Sometimes your friends, and even your family.

...And for the past 10 years, I never knew how to deal and solve that issue and kept me miserable for heeding towards what everybody else wanted. I recently found out I was not the only one who felt that way.

Suddenly, in the blink of an eye, that obstacle became a mere detail. I do agree with the common phrase, it's better late than never.

F.U.L.S.

2006-09-30T08:38:08Z

You know who you are. This is for you.

I thought I knew who you were
I see now, you were a lesson I learned and
All I am to you now is a bridge that's been burned

Now I was the first to believe
I gave support to your life and your dreams and
Your thanks to me came without an apology

I'd listen to you until the day turned into night time
Every single day at Starbucks
Don't forget the times when I had your back when your
Lovers left you as if you're an old fuck

Yet this song is for you to remind you that
I moved on, I have my friends, I've got no regrets

Hope that all was worth it. Seems like I didn't need you.
For once, I've been having great company, sex and have been wanted everywhere.
Thanks.

Heh.

2006-09-29T21:39:31Z

I'm finally living in peace. I'm amazed by how long it took for everything to settle in. It's amusing to see how so many things can happen in a couple of months, and as a spectator in the eve of the events, my point of view on a lot of things have changed.

It's safe to say I'm not the person I used to be. I'm finally glad to be the person on the opposite side of the stage and viewing life take its toll on everyone. It was about time I stepped out of the spotlight and getting back to myself.

With that said, what the hell has everybody been up to?

forgiveness.

2006-05-19T07:00:09Z

forgiveness is more than saying sorry
to forgive is divine, so let's have a glass of wine
and have makeup sex 'til the end of time.

4 am

2005-05-19T11:19:56Z

Arghh, I woke up just about an hour ago. I actually slept early last night, at about 10 or 11 PM. I had a weird dream, can't even remember it, but I remember I woke up laughing. I think I was making fun of Lizette and I imitated her really good, I woke up bursting in laughter. I'm still laughing now.

The reason why I said that's early, although it may seem relatively late to many, is because I've been partying like the shameless college student I am during the past week. In the midst of smoke and music I've been resting, it's fun. They cut my hours from work and I told my manager I found another job. His reaction was memorable and hilarious: "I'm giving you all the hours!!!" Bitch, please. He actually is, so I'm a bit amused. I'm still keeping my other job. I'll start this week, I think.

Although I have been a bit doubtful about it, I have to relax and realize it is being noticed since at least 5 people have told me I've been getting thinner. The reason I find it doubtful is because I haven't been dieting or excercising. Well, maybe if you only eat Whataburger, McDonald's, Jack & Mr. Wus, then that's my diet. Jealous you must be.

Also, during this past month I've learned to relax and take things easily. Jesus, I used to be really apprehensive. Maybe I was with the wrong people? In any case, I think clubbing, people and reading are my therapy, these things make me rejoice with glee. For example, last weekend, I was at the club with some pals and we were at our table getting drinks and devouring cigarrettes like no tomorrow when this guy comes to us and tells me and my friend's girlfriend we're really good dancers. I blushed and laughed and told him we're actually dancers. LIES. I haven't danced in a year, but it felt good anyway, I'm a bit excited since I'm going out to Mexico this weekend to go clubbing again with my dearest Gaby. I haven't gone to Mexico to party in ages, watch me be kidnapped.

I have until the end of June for my mini-vacations cause I'll start my summer sessions. Fun. I got by mail my "Memoirs of a Geisha" book, so I'll probably start reading today. I think I'm gonna go get some Jack in the Box now, I'm hungry, rawr. Have a good day.

- Carlitos

snippity snap

2005-03-21T17:18:06Z

I've come to the conclusion that I hate filtering my damn lists. I hate filtering, period, especially in this thing, mine, my words, my tales and what have you.

In other words, ehh, I don't trust you, so, yeah, heh.

Bye.

public entry!

2005-02-23T08:33:19Z

let the aversity begin.

so, dilemma (i feel like putting 'mn' rather than 'mm,' damn my grammar will) here: i need to cut my hair.

reason #1: it's too thick, puffy, and odd. i feel like a homeless (hi @ the people who call me hobo) ass and uncovering my face from hair every so often just doesn't look right.
reason #2: i think i'm bored of this hairstyle, but i refuse to get it shortly trimmed again.

due to my oh-so-busy schedule and low funds in my accounts, i won't be able to go to a salon to get aid, well, at least not this week. anyone suggest a hairstyle? all suggestions welcome. muahar.

hopefully i won't work sunday morning, since i made plans with gaby to go to 'knockout,' a new bar in mexico. i really want to go, and of course, spend more time with my good ol' buddy. if i get money soon, i'm changing my phone cause now everyone and their mother has the same phone i have now. well, that's not the reason, but my antenna is in a coma and the people i talk to don't appreciate being cut every other minute.

my customers just don't like it when you're talking dirty and right before the climax, they're submerged in a mute conversation.

if any of you read harry potter's prisoner of azkaban, then you'd know how much i would love the watch hermioninnie had to reverse time. oh, if life was that simple. (minus the special effects)

good day.
- c

Sup.

2003-08-29T22:30:26Z

1. I am not punk, goth, emo, stupid or whatever people do to put trendy phrases in their user info.
2. I really dislike anything emo, punk, hip hop, rock or whatever the hell is on the radio.
3. I cuss like a sailor. Holla!!!
4. I don't do lj 'rate me and accept me cause high school just wasn't long enough' groups. Invite me, but I won't join 'em.
5. I used the pronoun 'I' too much so far. You can have an idea of what this journal beholds.
6. I talk shit. Oh. You. Bet. I. Do.
7. I need three more reasons to finish this stupid list.
8. I don't care for comments, unless they're important.
9. I am almost done, so hold on to your socks.
10. I am done, so thanks for reading. Now die.

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- Carlitos